My unknown desire
by just-a-crazyfanpire
Summary: England, 1865. She is a wallflower. He is a reformed rake. She loves him, but she is invisible to him. He loves another woman, but he will never have her. What happens when a scandal breaks out and they are forced to marry? Will love blossom? - EdwardxBella
1. Rejected

Hello, everyone. I'm back. :)  
I have had this idea/story in my head for so long, that I am actually glad to see it written. It has been awhile since I last published something here. I missed writing. I hope you enjoy this little story of mine.

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**Rejected**

The candelabra bathed the entire room in a soft, golden light, creating both a romantic and a mysterious atmosphere. Music came from the orchestra, beckoning everyone to dance and lose themselves in the intricate steps of a quadrille. Cool drinks awaited those who needed a respite from dancing. The doors to the balcony were wide open, a temptation to those reckless couples who wanted privacy.

The ballroom was filled with bachelors, widowers and widows, young, beautiful ladies looking for wealthy husbands, couples of various ages. And then, there was Isabella Swan, daughter of the Viscount of Canterbury, Charlie Swan. A wallflower.

"Don't worry, darling. These gentlemen are all a bunch of idiots."

Bella looked at her little sister, Rosalie, with an indulgent smile. She would have scolded her for her language, but she secretly agreed with her. Unlike Rosalie who had just made her debut into society four months ago, Bella had been around for more than two years. She was already used to being invisible, although that didn't make it any less uncomfortable or painful.

Rosalie was two years younger than Bella, but she was three times more beautiful. Ever since she made her debut, everyone had looked up to her, admiring her dresses, her perfect features, her blond, long hair. London was simply enamored with her. Bella knew everyone expected her to be jealous of her sister, judging by the covert looks she always received when the both of them entered a ballroom. In truth, she felt happy for her.

"Don't mind me," Bella said. "Enjoy yourself. You have already been invited to dance by three men. It seems that not all of them are idiots." She winked at Rosalie, taking a sip of her drink.

"Yes, but it doesn't seem fair that you get to spend the entire night standing here, doing nothing."

"What makes you think I'm doing nothing?" Bella raised an eyebrow. "Alice and her husband promised to make an appearance tonight, so I will not be alone for the rest of the night. You can stop taking care of me, baby sister."

Rosalie sighed dramatically. "I just hate it that they can't see how special you are."

Bella accepted her praise with an amused chuckle. "Then, thank God I have you for that."

Rosalie squeezed Bella's arm, then looked around the ballroom. Bella recognized the look in her eyes and became suspicious. She downed the drink in one gulp and followed Rosalie's gaze toward a group of men. Two of them were watching Rosalie from beneath their lashes.

"Whatever you have in mind, forget about it."

"They are all eligible," Rosalie pointed out, "and very rich."

"You know I want more than that."

"Nobody marries for love anymore, Bella."

Bella sighed, knowing that all too well. "You don't have to remind me. But it doesn't matter, anyway. I am already on the shelf. Now, we need to focus on you and your future, because you have more chances of getting married than I do." Ignoring Rosalie's frown, she continued, "So, tell me. Is there any gentleman in particular that you like?"

"You always change the subject when we discuss _your _future. Why should I tell you about mine?"

"Humor me." Bella didn't want to talk about herself anymore. She had already resigned herself to a life of solitude and talking about it only heightened the pain and loneliness she had tried to hide for almost a year.

Rosalie shook her head, frustrated. "I don't actually like someone, but I do enjoy seeing all these men tripping over their feet to get my attention."

"You are wicked," Bella joked, earning a giggle from her sister. "Are you serious? Not even a man caught your eye?" She grew curious when Rosalie twirled the glass in her hand and smiled mysteriously into it. "Obviously, there is someone. Tell me."

"There is nothing to tell. It's nothing serious. We are just fooling around." Seeing the look on Bella's face, Rosalie rolled her eyes. "My reputation and my virtue are safe. We are being careful. I told you. Nothing serious is happening."

She didn't have a good feeling about this, but she knew she would waste her time lecturing her sister on proper behavior.

"Can you, at least, tell me his name?"

"I wish I could, but it would ruin the fun, wouldn't it?"

"I hope you know what you are doing."

"It's fine," Rosalie said with a careless smile. "Just an innocent, casual fling. Nothing major happened between us, aside from a few passionate kisses."

"Oh." For a second, Bella pictured herself in the embrace of a handsome man, being kissed to distraction. She shook those thoughts away. "You've made me very curious about this mysterious man. Well, at least, give me a hint. Is he in this room?"

"Maybe. Maybe not. I'm sorry, but we promised not to tell anyone, family or otherwise. Don't be mad." Rosalie flashed her Cheshire-cat smile at Bella, and Bella relented. "Besides, I don't think this fling will last too long."

"And why is that? I'm surprised he hasn't proposed to you yet."

"Oh no, God forbid." Rosalie looked troubled for a second. "I like him, and he is an amazing kisser, but I don't see myself married to him."

Bella raised her eyebrows, confused. She couldn't understand why Rosalie wasted her time on a man she didn't want to marry, but she had also never been kissed.

"I hope you don't break that man's heart, Rose."

The butler announced two new guests, and all the ladies turned toward the men descending the stairs, Lord Edward Cullen and Lord Emmett McCarty. Tall and handsome, Lord Cullen, Earl of Melburn, looked dashing in a black suit. His masculine, rugged features, his defined muscles and devil-may-care attitude drew women to him like moths to light. Every single lady in the room was watching him, some of them hiding their curious gazes behind their fans, while others stared blatantly. He gave a short nod to the hosts, excused himself from three eager mamas and let his gaze wander across the room.

Bella felt the temperature in the room rise as his eyes met hers for a fraction of a second, before they moved to her sister's and continued to peruse the entire crowd. Flustered and a little embarrassed by her crush on the man, she turned her back on him and looked at Rosalie.

"Well, they sure know how to make an entrance," Bella joked halfheartedly.

"Indeed," Rosalie agreed with a crooked smile. She winked at someone and then smothered a giggle.

"Who are you talking to?" Bella asked, looking behind her.

"No one important."

Bella wanted to insist, but a young man interrupted her, and she took a step back from the couple.

"I believe this is my dance, Miss Swan," the young man said with a confident smile, waiting for Rosalie to place her hand in his.

"Of course."

Bella watched them walk toward the dance floor. The first notes of a waltz rent the air, and other couples joined them. Their movements seemed so effortless and beautiful that Bella was dying to be among them. She wished a man, young or old, would come to her and ask her to dance with him, but no one was paying any attention to her. She suppressed a sigh full of longing.

Her gaze went to Lord Cullen, and her stomach flipped. He was talking to Lord McCarty, casually throwing a glance toward the dancing couples. If only he would notice her…

She had had a crush on the man since Rose's debut, when he had introduced himself to her family and asked Rosalie to dance. She didn't know what drew her to him, but since he didn't seem even remotely interested in her, she preferred to keep her distance. He was the most eligible bachelor in the room – handsome and rich. Mothers wanted him for a son-in-law, while young ladies wanted him to be either their husband or their lover. For the past several years, he had managed to remain unmarried, but there were rumors about his many mistresses. Lord Cullen had never denied them, nor had he confirmed them. He seemed like a very private person, which only made people more interested in him.

His friend of many years, Lord McCarty, was also a very handsome man, but his poor finances were known all over London, due to his father's gambling problem. Mothers kept their daughters away from him, even if the girls always found a way to reach him. He was also known for his good humor and optimism.

"Quit staring at them and give me a hug," a soft voice whispered in her ear, and Bella turned around to see her best friend, Alice Hale, smile at her.

With a blush, Bella wrapped her arms around her shoulders and squeezed gently. "I am so happy you could come. It was so boring around here, without you." She raised her head and saw her husband, Jasper Hale, Count of Sussex, give her a nod of acknowledgement. "Good to see you, Jasper."

Alice pulled away with a troubled expression. "We didn't really want to come. Poor Sophia is having a mild fever, and we wanted to stay with her. But my mom insisted that we should make an appearance tonight, since she and the hosts are good friends. We are not going to stay long."

"Oh, I understand. Your daughter must be so furious right now. She always told me how much she hated to catch a cold."

"You have no idea," Jasper answered with a slight shake of his head.

"But it isn't serious, is it?" Bella asked anxiously. She loved sweet, four year old Sophia, and she simply adored the fact that Sophia considered Bella her aunt.

"No," Alice said. "Besides this small fever, she is still her chirpy self."

"I am glad to hear that."

Alice and Jasper stayed only two hours, before they excused themselves and left to see how their little daughter was faring. Bella had lost sight of Rosalie a while ago and she tried not to worry about her. The last time she saw her sister, Rosalie had been dancing a quadrille with another young man.

When another hour passed, and she still didn't know where her sister was, Bella went to search for her. It was one of those rare occasions when she enjoyed her invisibility, because no one seemed to know why she was suddenly leaving her corner and walking around the ballroom.

Rosalie wasn't on the dance floor, nor was she on the balcony with some bloke. Bella realized that she might be with her mysterious man, and her stomach suddenly felt queasy. How could she be so irresponsible? What if someone saw them? And if she was with him, where were they? Surely, they hadn't gone in one of the rooms. Bella trusted her sister, but she didn't trust this mysterious man. What if he tried to take advantage of her?

She didn't know what to do. How could she find out where her sister was? She couldn't simply open every door in the house. Invisible or not, everyone would figure out that something was wrong, and that would bring unwanted attention toward her family.

She took a deep breath, telling herself that everything was going to be fine. Otherwise, she was going to make herself sick with worry. Rosalie was her little sister, and she was supposed to take care of her. Unlike their mother, who had chosen to leave London and forget that she had a family.

"Isabella, sweetheart, still sitting in the corner, I see," the dowager duchess of Hampshire said, her wrinkles accentuated by the powder on her face. Bella forced a smile and turned toward the old lady.

Behind one of the doors in the house, Rosalie was being kissed senseless by her mysterious man. Her fingers threaded through his soft hair. His arms wrapped around her small frame. Her tongue tangled with his. His groan matched hers.

There were only four candles lit in the room, casting a soft glow around them. The door was locked. The windows were closed and the draperies shut. The only sounds in the room were their ragged breaths and their occasional moans.

His lips trailed down her jaw and kissed her neck, finding a tender spot that made her sigh with pleasure. "We need to stop doing this," he whispered, his voice husky.

"Oh no, please, continue. I quite like what you are doing right now."

He pulled away and cupped her face in his hands. "I am not talking about this."

Rosalie reluctantly opened her eyes and looked at his serious face. Her knees were still wobbly from his passionate kisses, and she didn't think she was ready to break up with him right now. "Then, what are you talking about? Because we are wasting precious time, and someone might realize we are both missing."

He was quiet for a couple of seconds, just staring at her with his intense, bold gaze. Rosalie was growing impatient. She raised one of her eyebrows. When he still didn't say anything after a minute, she tried to press her lips to his, but he stopped her.

"Will you just tell me what's on your mind?" she asked, irritated.

"I love you, Rosalie. Marry me," he whispered.

Rosalie froze, with her eyebrows near her hairline. She would have never thought he would say those words to her. He was patiently waiting for her response, looking into her eyes.

Unfortunately, her first reaction was to burst into laughter. "You cannot be serious. I can't marry you. This is a short fling, meant to end sooner or later. Surely, you knew that."

She watched a shadow cross his features, and then his expression became unreadable. With a start, she realized that he was very serious about his confession and proposal. "We both knew that this wasn't meant to last. It was just for fun. It isn't like we talked about your future or mine. We simply kissed."

"I think you have made yourself very clear," he said sternly, turning around to leave. "Forget everything I said."

"Edward, please, be reasonable."

The sound of his name on her lips seemed to incense him, because he threw his hands in the air as he faced her again. "Reasonable? You knew how I felt about you," he almost screamed. "You knew from the beginning, and yet, you chose to give me hope that maybe you felt the same way about me. Do you need me to remind you that you were the one who started this?"

"Don't you dare blame me for this situation. I never even hinted at falling in love with you. You were the only one who assumed things that weren't true."

"Oh? So, this entire mess is my fault."

"I didn't say that. I don't think we are to blame for this. I guess we just got carried away by passion. I know I should have ended this fling before it got here, but you know how stressful these balls and events are. I needed a distraction." Realizing by the tormented expression on his face that she was only worsening the situation, she clamped her mouth shut.

"A distraction?" he whispered several beats later. "I was only a distraction to you?" He seemed to lose his temper for a second, but he quickly got his emotions under control. A muscle was ticking in his jaw, and his eyes were hard. "Glad I finally found out."

He looked at her in disdain and then turned his back on her.

Rosalie feared that he might slam the door on his way out, but he closed it softly, although she had the feeling that he was furious enough to punch a wall. Taking a deep, calming breath, she smoothed her dress and took care of her hair, in case it was disheveled. Then, she blew out the candles.

Shaking her head, she tried to pretend this never happened. Maybe she hadn't been exactly tactful in her rejection, but he had caught her off guard. How was she supposed to react when he dropped that confession in her lap?

She remembered Bella's words from earlier about breaking the man's heart and realized with a start that she had just done that. He looked hurt for a second, before his expression became unfathomable. Her brows furrowed in concern for a second, before she told herself that now was not the time to dwell on the situation.

Bella must be worried about her. Nervously smoothing her dress again, she counted to twenty, made sure no one would see her walking out of the room and then slowly closed the door behind her. She was ready to forget for a little while what happened between those dark, four walls, but as soon as she returned to the ballroom, something very unusual unsettled her, and she stopped in her tracks.

Edward was talking to her sister.


	2. Waltz with me

I own nothing.

Thank you so much for your reviews. I was a little anxious about the first chapter, if you were going to like it. Not everyone was pleased, but it's still the first chapter - things change as they go on.  
The story is set in 1865 (the 'mom' word was a typo - sorry :D ). And it's not going to be a love triangle :)  
Hope you like this chapter.

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**Waltz with me**

The first time Bella had been truly shocked was when her mother left. She was only seven years old, then, and Rosalie was barely five. She knew something was wrong when she saw their father wander around the house, pale and angry, ignoring his daughters' confused questions about their mother. Bella finally learnt the truth two days later from her father. In the beginning, she had refused to believe him, thinking that her mother would never leave them alone. But as the time passed, she realized with a sinking heart that it was all true. She had locked herself in her room for hours, crying herself to sleep and refusing to eat. Her father had tried to talk to her and soothe her, but Bella was heartbroken. Rosalie had been confused at first about their mother's leaving, but she had recovered more quickly than her sister. While Rosalie had learned to accept and forgive what their mother did, Bella couldn't. She had loved her too much.

Now was the second time something shocked her. Only a few minutes ago, Lord Cullen appeared in front of her. He officially introduced himself to her, while Bella could only stare wide-eyed at him, blinking like an utter idiot. Her heart was racing, her legs were trembling, and her palms were sweaty.

She couldn't believe her eyes. Why was Lord Cullen talking to her? He had never bothered to make her acquaintance before. Why the sudden change of heart?

"Excuse me, Miss, but are you feeling well?" His voice snapped her out of her reverie.

She cleared her throat, something a lady should never do in front of a gentleman, and stammered, "I am… I am alright, Milord." Fumbling with her skirts, she dipped into a curtsy. Her foot caught in her petticoat, and she almost fell down, but managed to regain her footing quickly. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment. She was making an awful first impression.

"Miss Swan, Milord. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"It's always a pleasure to meet the beautiful Swan sisters," he whispered with a rakish smile.

Bella almost told him to repeat what he just said, but she bit her tongue before the words escaped her mouth. He considered her beautiful? Her chest felt very warm, all of a sudden. Her lips stretched into a wide smile, and she hoped that it was charming enough to impress him.

"T-thank you, my lord."

"I saw you standing here alone, and it seemed the perfect opportunity to finally introduce myself to you. I hope you don't find me too bold."

"Oh no. Not at all." She raked her mind for something else to say, but her thoughts seemed to have fled her. Biting the inside of her cheek, she opened her fan to cool herself. How long had she been waiting for this moment. Now that he was finally talking to her, she couldn't even think of an interesting subject to discuss with him.

"The ball seems to be a success," he said, throwing a casual glance around the ballroom.

"Yes, indeed. Lord Weber and his wife have always been known for their beautiful balls." Bella's hand tightened on her fan, thinking that he was searching for a way to escape, but he surprised her when he looked at her again and said, "Have you been to many of them?"

All of them, actually. And as pathetic as that sounded, she had always been watching him from afar, wondering if he would ever notice her.

"Yes, I have."

He had shared two or three dances with Rosalie over the years, but he hadn't once looked in Bella's direction, so she wasn't surprised when he simply nodded.

"Are you enjoying yourself, Miss Swan?"

"Yes, of course. It's a beautiful night."

He studied her for a second, making her more nervous than she already was. Then, he leaned toward her, and she tried not to gasp in surprise. It was already taking her a lot of effort to appear nonchalant, that his sudden proximity made her feel lightheaded.

With him being so close to her, she couldn't help taking in his features. His eyes were very green, mesmerizing in their intensity. His jaw was bold and strong, while his lips were full and almost swollen. She tried to keep her gaze away from those enticing lips and let her eyes fall to the wrinkled collar of his shirt.

"I don't believe you."

"Excuse me?"

"I don't think you are enjoying yourself. Otherwise, why would you sit here, alone?"

Her cheeks flushed again, and she dropped her gaze to the floor in embarrassment. "Maybe I enjoy being alone," she whispered, knowing how stupid that sounded coupled with her previous reaction.

From the corner of her eye, she saw his hand rise toward her face. He seemed to think better about the gesture, because he returned his hand to his side. "You shouldn't feel uncomfortable. I think that's a smart decision. If I had to choose between being alone or smothered by eager mamas, I would definitely choose the former."

A giggle slipped through her lips as she raised her head to look at him. "I don't think that's relevant in my case."

"Well, not really, but at least, I made you smile." He winked at her, and Bella's stomach fluttered with anticipation.

Rosalie appeared next to her. "Bella."

Bella's shoulders fell in disappointment at the interruption, before she remembered that only five minutes ago, she had been very worried about her sister's disappearance.

"Rosalie, I believe you have already met Lord Cullen," Bella said. She wanted to ask her where she had disappeared earlier or why she looked like she had an upset stomach. But that had to wait, at least until they were alone.

Rosalie looked at the earl with a forced smile on her face. "Of course." She dropped into a graceful curtsy, while Lord Cullen inclined his head and said, "I am glad to see you here, Miss Rosalie."

The music for a waltz had just started up.

"Yes, well, nobody can throw a more glamorous ball than the Webers." Rosalie abruptly turned toward Bella. "I was wondering if we could possibly go home."

"Go home?" Bella blinked, confused. She threw a quick glance at the earl, who was watching them intently. She was the one who left these balls early, but now she wanted more than anything to stay. "But it's barely half past midnight. Are you feeling alright?"

"I feel a headache coming on. I would very much like to leave."

Bella sighed, "Alright. I will tell the footman to bring the carriage around." Before she could leave, though, she turned to Lord Cullen to apologize for their early departure, but he interrupted her.

"I am sorry to hear about your headache, Miss Rosalie, but I came here for a dance, and I won't let you leave without granting me this waltz."

Bella's heart sank, and she struggled not to let it show on her face. What did she expect? That he was finally interested in her? She felt foolish for letting herself hope that he wanted to talk to her.

"I am sorry, my lord, but I do not feel well enough to dance right now," Rosalie answered haughtily, grasping Bella's arm.

Lord Cullen frowned at Rosalie, while a devilish smile splayed across his face. "I wasn't talking to you."

Bella was too stunned to be suspicious about the sudden tension that had sprung between her sister and the earl.

"Will you grant me this waltz, milady?" Lord Cullen asked Bella with a slight bow, extending his gloved hand toward her.

Before she could answer him, Rosalie tugged on her arm. Bella turned to her sister and saw her desperate eyes, but she couldn't refuse the earl. She didn't know if he would ever ask her again for a dance, and she couldn't miss this opportunity. But she felt guilty for leaving her sister's side, especially if she was sick.

"I would like an answer now, Miss Swan, before the song ends."

Bella gave Rosalie a pleading look, before she turned toward him. "Yes, I will dance with you." Rosalie squeezed her arm and then, let it go, but she didn't say anything.

Lord Cullen grasped her hand, and they both walked toward the middle of the ballroom, where the other couples were dancing. Her heart was in her throat, and her knees were trembling. Then, he drew her in his arms. Their bodies weren't touching, but for Bella, it felt like they were. The sensation of being so close to a man, a man she was so attracted to, made her feel giddy. He was taller than her, and she had to tip her head back to look at him. She was so excited about the dance that her feet caught in the hem of her dress, and she stumbled.

"I am sorry," she whispered, self-conscious.

"Don't worry about it," he whispered back, staring at the top of her head.

He was an excellent dancer. His movements were fluid and graceful, but bold and masculine at the same time. His hand on her back was warm and strong, and his scent was making her dizzy with excitement. Her gaze went to his face again and watched that beautiful mouth smile down at her. She couldn't have imagined a more beautiful moment than this. If he never looked at her again after tonight, she would savor this night forever.

As the song neared its end, she slowly grew aware of the whispers around them.

"…heard he invited her…"

"…odd that her sister…"

"…do you think he is interested…"

The whispers upset her a little bit, but she refused to let them ruin her night. She smiled at the earl and enjoyed the feel of his broad shoulder beneath her palm. When the song ended, Lord Cullen took a step back and bowed to her.

"It was a pleasure to share this dance with you, Miss Swan. You are a wonderful dancer."

She curtsied. "I can say the same thing about you, my lord."

He nodded and without another word, he walked away, disappearing in the crowd. Bella watched him until she couldn't see him anymore and then went to her sister. She tried to ignore everyone's curious glances and gave them all a short smile as she walked past them. Even she was curious about the earl's sudden interest in her.

Rosalie was anxious when Bella finally reached her. "Can we go home now?"

As soon as they were seated in the carriage, Bella grabbed both of her sister's hands. "Can you believe I actually danced with an earl?"

Rosalie bit her lip. "I am happy for you." She turned her gaze toward the window. "I didn't know you liked Cullen this much. Why didn't you tell me?"

Bella shrugged. "I didn't think it was important."

"I am your sister, Bella. Everything about you is important to me."

"Well, you didn't want to tell me about your secret affair, so I guess we are even." Bella saw Rosalie flinch. "I was worried about you. You didn't tell me anything before you simply vanished. I was a step away from opening every door in the house. I assumed you were with this gentleman, if I can even call him that for treating you like this. Is that why you disappeared for two hours?"

"You don't have to worry about that anymore. The entire thing is over. We shouldn't spend more time thinking about it, and we sure as hell shouldn't talk about it."

Since Rose never cussed, Bella was taken aback. "But something obviously happened to upset you this much. Is that why you wanted to leave so desperately or were you really feeling ill?"

"I meant it when I said I don't want to talk about it. Please, Bella," Rose murmured, her eyes begging her to drop the subject.

"Alright."

For a couple of minutes, they didn't say anything. Bella looked out the window, taking her white gloves off. She dropped them in her lap, but her hands lingered on them, remembering how warm his hands were.

"Did the two of you argue?"

"Bella!"

"You cannot just act like this and expect me to keep my mouth shut. I am curious to know what put you in such a mood."

Rosalie glared at her sister. "He proposed to me, all right? He told me he loved me and that he wanted me to be his wife."

Bella wasn't shocked about the man's proposition. She was stunned by Rose's reaction to the proposal. "Oh. And here I was thinking that the man was an utter fool for not proposing to you." Seeing Rosalie's mortified expression, Bella realized what the real problem was. "You refused him. Why?"

"I don't love him. I never did. I thought we were just having fun. How was I supposed to know he would fall in love with me?"

"Now who is the fool?" Bella asked rhetorically, shaking her head at Rosalie's predicament. "You should have expected it, Rose. If you haven't noticed, every man in London wants your hand in marriage. What made you believe that he was the exception?"

That only made Rosalie sag in her seat. "I guess it was just wishful thinking."

Bella joined Rosalie on the bench and put her arm around her sister's small shoulders. "Ah, my dear sister. What am I going to do with you?"

xXx

Edward knew something was wrong as soon as he stepped inside his house and saw his housekeeper's anxious expression. Mrs. Sue Clearwater was wringing her hands and exchanging anxious glances with the butler. Edward gave Harry his coat and tugged on his tie.

"What happened?"

Mrs. Clearwater cleared her throat and leaned toward Edward. She whispered, "Your mother is in the study."

Edward froze. His hand stilled on his tie, and his breath slowed. "When did she arrive?"

"Three hours ago, but she never once left the study. She told everyone to leave her alone."

He gave the housekeeper a brisk nod, as he started toward his study.

The last thing he wanted right now was to confront his mother. It had been one of the worst nights of his life, and all he wanted was to slip into oblivion. His temples throbbed, and his chest ached. He pinched the bridge of his nose, hoping to alleviate his pounding headache, but he knew nothing would soothe his heart.

As soon as he entered his study, he saw his mother sprawled on the floor with an empty bottle of brandy in her hands. Her auburn hair was disheveled, and her clothes were torn and dirty. Her once smooth, delicate face had wrinkles now, and there were dark, deep circles under her eyes.

Edward swallowed hard at the sight of her. She had once been such a beautiful woman. Now, she was only a shadow of her former self.

He walked toward her and took the bottle from her hand. Then, he gently scooped her up in his arms and realized how frail and thin she really was. Edward carried her outside his study and walked toward the staircase, knowing that the servants were watching him.

Without glancing at either one of them, he said, "Warm some water and bring it to her old bedchamber. Also, bring a new change of clothes."

"Yes, my lord," a couple of maids answered.

Edward took her to her bedroom, down the hall from his, on the second floor. He pushed the door open with his elbow and gently placed his mother on the bed. She stirred in her sleep and mumbled something under her breath. Running his hand through his hair, Edward pulled a chair close to the bed and sat down. He knew his mother wouldn't want him this close to her, but she looked so sick that he was scared to leave her alone. Her breath was already too shallow, and her skin looked very pale.

"Edward," she sobbed in her sleep. "Why did you hate me so much?"

Edward realized she was dreaming about his father, who had been dead for almost five years. His father had never been close to his son, and Elizabeth Cullen always reminded Edward of the reason.

"I was enchanted, bewitched, my love," she continued to cry, her small frame quivering. "I never meant to sleep with him, Edward. Please, forgive me."

His real father was a stable boy, only twenty years old when Edward was born. Edward never saw him, never talked about him. He only knew that the earl had thrown the man on the streets when he first found out about his wife's deception. Edward didn't know what became of the man, or if he was still alive. The earl had claimed Edward as his son in front of everyone, but not in his heart. His mother had always blamed her son for her husband's estrangement. It grew worse when Edward's father died, and Elizabeth started drinking.

Ever since he was a little boy, he had tried to justify his parents' distant behavior toward him, but even now, at twenty eight, he still felt a pang in his chest when his mother threw him a look full of loathing.

Just like the one she was throwing him right now.

"Get away from me," Elizabeth hissed.

"Don't try to leave the bed. You need to rest," he murmured, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Take your hand off me." She tried to sound intimidating, but her voice was trembling.

Edward slowly retrieved his hand and placed it on his knee. "What are you doing here, mother? I specifically told you to stay in Hampshire. This trip was too tiring for you, and you need to be more careful about your health."

"Why do you care?" She coughed and tried to get off the bed, but Edward gently pushed her down between the pillows. "Besides, you left me alone, with that old, stupid woman while you were having the time of your life in London."

"That woman is well-educated and a very good nurse. I told you I was only going to spend a couple of months in London, and then, I was going to join you in Hampshire."

"Don't bother. I don't want you there."

Edward ignored her last comment and continued, "Since you are already here, I will send for the nurse and have you established here, in your old room."

"Who says I want to stay here? I just wanted to leave that rotten house and see what my son is doing in London that he forgot about his poor mother. And where is that bourbon? Bring me a glass of brandy."

"You should stop drinking."

Elizabeth glared at him.

The door opened. Three maids entered the bedchamber, every one of them carrying either linens, clothes or steaming water. Behind them were two footmen, who were carrying the tub inside. They placed it on the floor, under the window and let the maids continue their duties.

"I am not taking a bath," Edward's mother protested, but he knew she was too weak to fight with the maids.

"I will talk to you in the morning, mother," Edward said as he stood up. He almost leaned to kiss her forehead, but he stopped before she saw what he wanted to do. She wouldn't accept even that small kiss from him. So, he just turned his back on her and walked outside the door.

With a heavy sigh, he entered his bedchamber and closed the door behind him. He was tired. He had gone to the ball so optimistic, so happy with his decision to marry Rosalie, that he still couldn't grasp the fact that she had refused him. She laughed in his face. Obviously, his feelings meant nothing to her. He was such an idiot. Not even his mother and father could love him. What made him believe that Rosalie would?

He sat down on the edge of the bed, propping his elbows on his knees. He had wanted to make Rosalie jealous when he asked Isabella Swan to dance, but that had been a mistake. Her sister had seemed so eager to dance with him, that now he felt like a cad for taking advantage of her like that. With a long sigh, he poured himself a glass of brandy and closed his eyes.


	3. Scandal

I own nothing.

Thank you for your reviews and sorry for the delay.

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**Scandal**

There was a knock on the door. Edward said, "Enter."

The butler appeared in the doorway. "You have a visitor, milord."

Edward and Emmett exchanged a confused look. "Who is it, Harry?"

Harry glanced at Emmett, then back at Edward. "The person doesn't want me to reveal her identity."

"Her?" Emmett raised one of his eyebrows, suddenly curious. With a sly grin, he turned to his friend. "Who might this woman be? Do I know her, Harry? Is she the wife of some unfortunate bloke?"

Edward glared at Emmett, before he looked at the butler. "Emmett is my friend, Harry. You can tell us who this woman is."

Harry cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Well, milord, she is…" He hesitated, while both Edward and Emmett waited patiently for the man to talk. "Miss Rosalie Swan."

Emmett frowned, while Edward jumped to his feet. "What is she doing here?" Emmett asked tersely. "If someone finds out, Edward –"

"I know," Edward interrupted him. "Tell her to wait for me in the parlor."

Harry nodded and closed the door after him. Emmett looked at his friend, with a scowl on his face. Edward didn't need to hear what he had to say – he could guess what Emmett was thinking. "I seriously hope you are not going to do something stupid, Edward. And why did you agree to meet with her? You should have sent her on her merry way. She doesn't deserve your attention anymore, not after what she did to you."

"I didn't agree to meet with her, because I still hope that she has changed her mind about me. I'm just curious what she really wants. It's obvious she came here for a reason."

Emmett sighed and lifted his shoulders in defeat. "I see your mind is already made up. Go talk to her, then." He downed the last of his whiskey. "Then, come back and tell me everything."

Edward rolled his eyes in amusement and left his office. He hadn't lied to Emmett. He didn't know what Rosalie was doing here, so late in the afternoon. But mostly, he resented seeing her again after yesterday's disappointment.

She was facing the window, staring off into the distance. Edward closed the door loudly, waiting for her to turn around.

"What are you doing here?" he asked coldly, clasping his hands behind his back.

"Edward," she greeted him with a short nod. She took a few steps toward him. "Why did you dance with my sister last night?" she asked directly, furrowing her brow.

Edward was taken aback by the question. "Why are you asking?"

"Bella is my sister, and I love her. I don't want to see her hurt. If this is some kind of ploy to get back at me for refusing your proposal, take your anger out on me. Leave my sister out of this. She doesn't deserve to have her hopes raised."

"That had been a mistake. I don't want to hurt your sister," he whispered.

"I hope you mean that."

She wanted to leave, but he was watching her so intently, he made her feel very uneasy and self-conscious.

"Did you ever care about me?" he whispered, his lips barely moving.

Surprised by the question, Rosalie fumbled for words. "What? I … I, of course I did."

"Did you care about me when you laughed in my face?"

"Edward, you caught me off guard. I wasn't prepared for your confession. I am sorry I hurt your feelings."

Edward almost laughed bitterly. Hurt his feelings? More like broke his heart.

"You should go. I am sure everyone is wondering where you are. You don't want them to find you here, without a chaperone. God forbid you will be forced to marry me."

"Edward –"

"Just leave, Rosalie," he insisted. "Don't make me throw you out."

She looked at him, troubled. She had known the man for four months and kissed him for two, but they had never really talked about anything important during their meetings. When he first asked her to join him on the balcony at one of the balls, she immediately accepted, because she was bored. Everyone seemed interested in her, but she wasn't interested in anyone. Edward was tall, handsome and smart, so Rosalie thought it would be a good idea to spend some time with him. She was the first one to kiss him on that balcony. She was the one to suggest an affair with him. Edward seemed content only to kiss her, and he never pushed her to do something she didn't want. Now, she realized that she had been stupid to think Edward would never fall in love with her. She had made a mistake and she didn't know how to fix it.

Without saying anything more, she walked past Edward. As she was walking toward the front door, she saw Lord McCarty standing in the doorway of the office, staring at her with a frown. She returned his stare as she got out of the house.

Edward stepped out of the parlor, and as he was walking toward his office, he met his friend's curious gaze. As soon as they closed the door behind them, Edward told Emmett everything Rosalie had said.

"I always thought her older sister was better than her. Rosalie Swan always seemed so shallow and self-absorbed. Isabella was more mature."

Edward raised his eyebrows. "If I remember correctly, you tried to court Isabella."

"Yes," Emmett admitted. "When she first made her debut, I asked her to dance with me a couple of times. She was beautiful, but she was so shy…" His lips stretched into a wide smile. "Nonetheless, I realized she wasn't interested in me, and that I was not ready to get married." He seemed to remember something, because he became serious. "Which reminds me… I don't want to say it, but I have to agree with Rosalie on this. Isabella Swan doesn't deserve to be taken advantage of. That was a stupid thing you did, Edward."

Edward sighed. "I know."

xXx

Bella closed her eyes in pain. Her temples were throbbing. She had had a headache since she arrived at the Tanners' ball, and she didn't know how to alleviate it. Both her father and her sister had joined their friends, but she had refused to accompany them. She could have told her father that she wasn't feeling well, but he would have insisted they go back home, and she didn't want to ruin his night.

Besides, he had shown a little interest in the dowager countess of Westhamp, Victoria Sherlay. It would be a shame if they had to leave before he had a chance to talk to her.

Bella looked around the ballroom and saw Rosalie laughing with Lord Crowley. The poor man seemed infatuated with her, but surprisingly, so did Rosalie. For a second, Bella wondered if he was the mysterious man, when someone startled her.

"Miss Swan."

She turned around and saw Lord McCarty smiling down at her. She smiled back. "Lord McCarty. It's such a pleasure to see you."

"Likewise. I saw you arrive earlier and wondered what you have been doing lately."

"Oh, not much. My father came back from France two days ago, and I have been trying to teach him a few words in English," she jested, smiling again when he chuckled.

"That must have been a burden."

"Yes, it was."

Emmett looked over her shoulder and frowned at someone. When he returned his gaze to her, his smile was a little troubled. "Save me a dance?"

"Of course," Bella whispered, unsure. She followed him with her gaze, wondering what made him leave so soon. He was walking toward his father, who seemed a little intoxicated and was already drawing attention. She saw Lord McCarty taking his father out on the balcony. Bella shook her head sympathetically.

She took a sip of her cold drink. She wanted a few moments of silence. Leaving her glass on the closest table, she walked toward the drawing room. The room was bathed in darkness, except for the weak moonlight that streamed in the window. She sat down on the sofa and closed her eyes, enjoying the silence. She didn't want to spend too much time in this room, in case Lord McCarty wanted to claim his dance.

She realized she hadn't seen Lord Cullen arrive at the ball. She heard that he was leaving London tomorrow morning, taking his mother back to Hampshire. She wasn't going to see him again until next season. Hopefully, her infatuation with him would end until then.

The door to the balcony opened, and Bella gasped in surprise. She hadn't expected anyone to be in here. She was even more surprised to see the earl enter the drawing room.

"Lord Cullen," she exclaimed. "I didn't know you were in here. I thought the room was empty."

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Miss Swan. Are you alright?"

"Yes, I just wanted some quiet."

He nodded contemplatively. "I understand. I came here for the same reason. I just wanted to be alone."

Bella gestured toward the door. "I think I should go. I didn't…"

He seemed to realize what he had said, because he looked bashful. "No, I didn't mean it like that. Stay. I was leaving anyway."

Her traitorous heart almost believed for a fraction of a second that he was asking her to stay with him, before she realized that it wasn't even proper.

"Besides, if anyone finds us in here, alone…" he trailed off.

Bella nodded, with a shy smile. "Oh, of course. You are right. God knows what people will think."

He was walking toward the door when the question flew out of her mouth. "Are you leaving tomorrow?" She hadn't really meant to ask him that, but now that she did, she wanted to hear his answer.

He stopped and looked down at her. He didn't ask her how she knew that piece of information, because it was futile. Everyone knew he was leaving London before the end of the season. "Yes, I am."

Bella tried not to let the disappointment she was feeling show on her face. Even though she already knew he was leaving, hearing him confirm the rumors was disappointing. "Well, then I hope you have a good trip, although I am sure you will be missed around here."

_By whom?_ he thought. His eyes met hers. He stared at her for a couple of seconds, not knowing what to say to her, without hurting her feelings. Even though she was trying to seem nonchalant and casual, her smile was a little sad and her brown, warm eyes inviting. She was a beautiful girl, who deserved someone that could reciprocate her feelings. "I…"

Unfortunately, the spell was broken when someone opened the door, and they both sprang away from each other.

"Oh my God," someone cried out from the doorway.

Bella turned around to see the duchess of Hampshire, also known for her tendency to gossip. She looked at the earl, but his expression wasn't betraying anything. Realizing their predicament, she swallowed hard and tried to smile at the duchess, but she was too shocked to react. The old woman was staring at them, wide-eyed, with her hand on her chest.

"Your Grace," Edward said, with a short nod. The poor woman fainted.

xXx

"I can't believe you did this. What the hell were you thinking?" Rosalie almost yelled at Bella, as they were going back home.

By the time the duchess awoke, everyone else knew she had been alone with the earl in the drawing room. The women had looked at her, shocked, while the men had seemed merely surprised. While Bella had managed to ignore their reactions, she couldn't ignore Rosalie's and her father's. Rosalie had been so furious when she first found out, that Bella was impressed Rose hadn't yelled at her in front of everyone. Her father had somehow managed to remain calm.

She didn't know where Edward went after he helped her with the duchess. He had tried to salvage the situation, but there was nothing he could say that would convince the duchess she hadn't just seen them together.

"Rosalie, language," Charlie scolded her. He looked at Bella. "But she is right. What the hell were you thinking?"

"I didn't want this to happen, but –"

"Oh, really? You didn't want this to happen? Then how-"

"Rosalie," Charlie interrupted his furious daughter. "I understand why you are so angry with your sister, but you might want to keep your voice down."

"Do you even realize what she had just done?" Rosalie hissed, glaring at Bella. "You ruined your reputation. Everyone knows you were alone with the earl. Do you have any idea what that means?"

"That I have engaged in scandalous behavior?" Bella asked sarcastically. How dare Rosalie lecture her about her behavior, when she had been doing the same thing?

"How can you be so blasé about this?"

"Girls! We will talk about this when we get home."

Bella and Rosalie shared a dirty look, before Bella turned her head and looked out the window. She felt oddly calm. Maybe she was in shock that her perfect, untainted reputation had been ruined, something she hadn't thought possible.

As soon as they got home, Bella got out of the carriage and ran inside, followed by Rosalie. Both the butler and the housekeeper were surprised to see the girls home so early, and they definitely knew something was wrong the moment they saw Lord Swan's expression.

Bella gave Michael her cloak and walked toward the stairs, when her father said, "We need to talk, Bella."

Bella simply nodded, although she was conscious of everyone staring at her. She hadn't done anything wrong, yet everyone treated her like she had just killed the queen. Feeling unfairly blamed, she followed her father in his office, knowing Rosalie was right behind her. Her sister closed the door behind them, and they both turned toward her. Bella felt cornered.

"I didn't do anything. _We _didn't do anything," Bella defended herself. "I just wanted to be alone for a few moments, and I didn't know that the earl was going to be in there."

"What is done is done," Charlie interrupted her, shaking his head in contrition. "Whether you met by accident or it was deliberate, it doesn't matter anymore. Everyone knows you were alone in that room, and their imagination is running rampant."

Seeing that look in his eyes, Bella suddenly knew what he was thinking about. "Maybe I can -"

"There is no maybe. Don't you understand, Bella? The duchess of Hampshire saw you together." He took a step toward her, his eyes kind and sympathetic. "You are my daughter, and I want what's best for you. In order to restore your reputation, you have to marry Lord Cullen."

An hour later, Bella was staring out the window, unable to sleep. She didn't know how she felt. She wasn't gullible enough to think that Lord Cullen was in love with her or that he was even going to propose to her now that her reputation was compromised. She didn't even know if she wanted him to. She had always wanted to marry out of love, not because she had to.

Someone knocked on the door. Before Bella could say anything, Rosalie opened the door and walked inside.

"I couldn't sleep, either," Rosalie whispered sheepishly.

Bella showed her the chair next to her, telling Rosalie to sit down. "What do you want?"

Rosalie wrung her hands in her lap, laced and unlaced her fingers. "I am sorry. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did."

"I don't understand why you reacted like that. You know me. You know I would have told you if I had agreed to meet with him."

"I know, and I am so sorry." Rosalie stood up and nervously ran a hand through her long hair. "I just … I didn't know what to say when I heard you were found together. I thought that maybe he convinced you to dally with him, because he wants to–" She stopped suddenly, looking at Bella with wide, fearful eyes.

Confused by her expression, Bella frowned. "Because he wants to what?" She slowly stood up, starting to feel a little apprehensive.

"I didn't come here because I couldn't sleep. I mean, yes, but that's only because something has been bothering me, ever since we came home tonight." Rosalie turned toward her sister. "I don't know how to tell you this."

"How about you just say it already? You are making me nervous."

"Alright," Rosalie whispered, biting the inside of her cheek. Her palms were sweaty, and her heart was racing. "The man I had had an affair with… That man was Edward Cullen."


	4. Complications

I own nothing.

Thank you so much for your reviews. :) Kisses to everyone.  
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**Complications**

Rosalie watched nervously as Bella's expression slowly turned from confused to hurt. She swallowed hard and took a step toward her sister.

Bella backed away and whispered, "What?"

"I am so sorry. I know I should have told you sooner, but I was afraid of your reaction. When you told me that you liked Cullen, everything changed. And then, you were caught together, and I knew I couldn't keep this a secret anymore."

Bella struggled to comprehend what Rosalie was telling her. "Edward Cullen is the man who proposed to you and told you that he is in love with you." Seeing the guilt on Rosalie's face, Bella felt all her hopes crumbling to dust. "On the night he asked me to dance with him."

Her heart broke when she realized that the dance had meant nothing to him, when it had meant everything to her. She blinked quickly, turning around. He had used her, and she had been stupid enough to think that he liked her.

"He asked me to dance with him, right after you refused his proposal," she realized. "He used me to make you jealous, and you didn't say anything." She quickly turned toward Rosalie, her eyes already filling with tears of anger and hurt. "When I told you that I liked him, why didn't you tell me the truth? Why did you let me get my hopes up?"

Rosalie's bottom lip trembled. "You were so excited that I didn't want to ruin your happiness."

Bella laughed humorlessly, throwing her hands in the air. "Now, I am supposed to marry my sister's lover. How is that going to make me happy?"

"I know," Rosalie whispered, her voice shaking. "I didn't want this to happen."

Bella looked at her sister, not knowing what to say anymore. "I want to be alone."

Rosalie opened her mouth to say something, but she closed it immediately. Pursing her lips, she nodded twice and left the room. As soon as the door closed, two tears rolled down Bella's cheeks.

The next thing she knew, it was morning, and her maid was shaking her awake. "Miss Swan? Bella, you have a visitor."

Bella slowly opened her eyes and looked at Irina. From the maid's baffled expression, Bella realized she looked like hell. Her eyes were probably red and puffy, and her mouth felt dry. She must have cried herself to sleep.

"A visitor?" she croaked, sitting up.

"Are you alright?" the maid asked, concerned.

"I feel wonderful," Bella answered absentmindedly. "What were you saying about this visitor?"

Irina didn't seem convinced by her response. "Well, he is talking to your father right now. Lord Swan asked me to wake you up."

"He?" Bella didn't need to ask Irina who she was talking about. She already knew.

"Lord Cullen," Irina answered, taking a purple, beautiful dress out of the wardrobe. "He arrived only ten minutes ago and asked to see your father." Irina raised her eyebrows, curious, when she saw Bella's grim expression. "I suppose that is a good sign, isn't it? I thought you were going to be more excited about it."

Bella pushed the covers away. "I don't have a reason to be excited."

Fifteen minutes later, Bella was descending the stairs, her steps growing slower and slower as she was approaching the office. She didn't want to face Edward. She didn't want to talk to him. But first of all, she didn't want to marry him. Unfortunately, she didn't think she had a choice.

She slowly walked toward the office and stopped as soon as her hand touched the doorknob. Her heart was hammering inside her chest. She could hear their voices through the door. Taking a deep breath for courage, she opened the door and walked inside.

Edward and her father turned around and looked at her. They both stood up to greet her, but Bella simply nodded and sat down on the couch. She hated the fact that her heart skipped a beat when she saw him. She didn't want to feel anything for him.

"Bella, I suppose you know why I summoned you here," Charlie said.

"Yes, I do," she said shortly.

"Nonetheless, I would like to ask you," Edward said as he walked toward her.

Bella clenched her teeth, looking down at her feet. She wasn't expecting him to kneel in front of her, but he did. This time, she didn't have a choice. She met his gaze, and everything Rosalie had told her the other night popped in her head. He didn't love her. He loved Rosalie. He wanted to marry Rosalie, not her. Her hands were trembling, and she hid them in the folds of her dress.

"Isabella Marie Swan, will you marry me?" His green eyes were serious, although his lips were slightly curved into a smile.

Bella looked into his eyes and whispered, "No."

Edward seemed surprised by her response, but Charlie was the first one to react. "What? Bella, you realize you don't–"

She interrupted her father, still looking at Edward. "No, I don't want to marry you, but I don't have a choice. It doesn't matter what my answer is going to be. My fate has already been sealed. Now, if you don't mind, I would like to leave."

Edward slowly stood up. "Lord Swan, do you mind leaving us alone for a few minutes?"

Bella stiffened. She especially didn't want to be alone with him.

Charlie was silent for a few seconds before he finally answered, a little reluctantly, "Not at all."

They both waited for her father to leave the room. Bella dropped his gaze and walked toward the window, folding her arms across her chest. She could feel Edward behind her, but she didn't turn around.

"You know," he whispered a minute later.

She swallowed hard. "Unfortunately for you."

Edward noticed her rigid shoulders and the way she held herself. Rosalie must have told her the truth. He couldn't blame her. After all, Bella was her sister. He also couldn't blame Bella for refusing to marry him. Still, it made the entire situation even more complicated that it already was. Bella was going to be his wife, even though he had never thought about that possibility.

He took a step toward her, trying to gauge her reaction.

She didn't say anything, although her shoulders hunched a little. He continued, "I know this is … odd, for the both of us, but we can make this work."

She suddenly turned around, her eyes ablaze with anger. "Make this work? How do you suggest we do that? Pretend we are a happy couple, madly in love with each other when we both know that you love Rosalie?" Tears stung the back of her eyes, and a lump formed in her throat. "Or were you going to do that anyway, because you want to make her jealous?"

He froze, seeing the hurt on her face. Her eyes were sparkling with tears, and her bottom lip was trembling. He wanted to replace that sadness he saw in her eyes, but he couldn't. He had already hurt her too much.

"I don't think it's going to matter if I tell you how sorry I am," he said.

Bella looked at him, not knowing what to think anymore. Even though he felt sorry, how was that going to make this situation any better? He would still love Rosalie, and Bella would still love him.

"I have to go," she whispered, anxious to get out of the room. She could barely hold back her tears, and the last thing she wanted was to cry in front of him.

"Bella…" he trailed off as his hand gently caught her elbow.

She swiftly shook his hand off. "Don't…" she gasped at first, startled by his touch and then continued, more calmly, "touch me. I told you, it doesn't matter. I said I was going to marry you, and you can talk to my father about the wedding. I don't care."

Edward watched her slam the door shut. He rubbed his face with his hands. How did this happen? How did he get engaged to Rosalie's sister in less than twenty four hours? What kind of marriage were they going to have? She obviously hated him for his deception, and with good reason. She could barely stay in the same room with him. How were they going to live as husband and wife? How were they going to share a bed? Everything seemed so muddled.

He wished he could go back in time and stop himself from ever getting involved with Rosalie.

"What happened?" Charlie Swan walked inside, his eyebrows raised in confusion.

"Nothing," Edward answered.

"That didn't sound like nothing," Charlie pointed out. "Besides, I thought I saw Bella crying. Did you say something hurtful to her?"

Edward felt like the villain again, and hearing that Bella had left the office crying, he probably was. But he wasn't going to tell Charlie the truth.

"No, of course not. She is just upset with this wedding. I am sure she would have preferred a husband of her own choosing."

Charlie sighed. "I know, but now, it's too late." He sat down at his office and clasped his hands together on top of the desk. "This wedding is going to happen, and I would prefer it sooner rather than later."

One hour later, Edward was shaking Charlie's hand. They decided that the wedding would take place in a week, and that it would be a small ceremony, with friends only. Edward hadn't really been that enthusiastic about it, especially knowing that he had only one week to get accustomed to the idea of being Bella's husband.

He walked out of the office and saw Rosalie descending the stairs. They both stopped for a second to look at each other. He saw her take a deep breath, before she descended the rest of the stairs and came toward him.

"You told Bella," he said.

"She deserved to know," Rosalie answered immediately, clearing her throat uncomfortably. "I knew you would do the honorable thing and ask her to marry you. I couldn't let her accept your proposal without knowing what she was getting herself into."

He nodded. "I understand. Where is she right now?"

Rosalie looked down at her feet. "She is in her room. I tried to talk to her, but she doesn't want to see me. I know _you_ talked to her. What did she say?"

"She looked hurt and angry," Edward whispered, watching Rosalie flinch. "She accepted my proposal, but she made it very clear that she would never be happy as my wife."

Laughing bitterly, Rosalie said, "I told you not to hurt her. Ironically, I was the one who broke her heart."

"We are both to blame," Edward countered. "We should have never gotten together. Maybe this scandal wouldn't have happened. But then, again, maybe it would have happened anyway. We don't know that. But what I do know is that I want to make this marriage work, even if it takes years to convince Bella of that."

Without saying anything more, he turned around and started toward the front door. He didn't look behind at Rosalie. She was a closed chapter of his life, and that was never going to change. He walked outside and toward his carriage, but before he got in, he stopped and looked at the house.

Bella was watching him from her room, her face unsmiling. As soon as their eyes met, she quickly dropped the curtain and disappeared from his view.

In her room, Bella heavily sat down on the bed and buried her face in her hands.

Someone knocked on her door.

"Leave me alone, Rosalie," she said curtly.

"Does that apply to me, too?" Her father opened the door and looked at her inquisitively.

"Oh, father. Come on in." Bella tried not to look as upset as she felt. With a weak smile on her face, she stood up.

"Why don't you want to talk to Rosalie? And first of all, why didn't you want to talk to the earl? What really happened between the three of you?" Charlie walked toward her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Nothing," Bella answered quickly. "Don't worry about it. Everything is fine. Why did you want to talk to me?"

Charlie didn't seem convinced. It was obvious he was still curious about it, but he decided to ask later. He had come to see Bella for another reason.

"I came to tell you about the wedding. Since everyone is already talking about the two of you, we decided to have the wedding next week."

Bella froze. "Next week? But that is so … soon."

Charlie smiled, a little melancholy. "I know, sweetheart, but it's for the best. I don't want you to feel ashamed to go out in public for something you didn't do, because yes, I trust you. If you say nothing happened between the two of you last night, I believe you. But even though I believe you, your reputation will still be tarnished."

"A quick wedding is not going to change anything. It will be proof that something really happened, and they will be waiting to see my baby bump."

Charlie pinched the bridge of his nose with the tip of his fingers. "What do you really want, Bella? Postpone the wedding? Fine, we will postpone the wedding. But whether you marry him now or in two months, everyone will still be talking about you. It doesn't matter when you marry him. The only difference is that if you marry him now, everyone will be forced to show you the respect you deserve as the new countess of Melburn."

Bella knew he was right, but it didn't make the situation any easier. Overwhelmed, she threw her arms around her father and buried her face in his chest. "You are right. I will marry him next week."

To her dismay, the week passed entirely too quickly. She had been trying to avoid both her sister and her fiancée, helping with the wedding preparations. Edward had come to see her twice, but she had refused to spend more than ten minutes in his company. It still hurt to see him, mostly because Bella was still picturing her sister in his arms, kissing passionately. At first, Rosalie had decided to give Bella some space, but now, it was obvious she was starting to lose patience with her.

The next thing she knew, it was her wedding day, and she completely dreaded it.


	5. I don't

I own nothing.

Thank you so much for your reviews. Sorry for taking so long to update. I try to write a little every day, but there are days when I have no idea how to continue, so I take a break. :D Hope you like this chapter. Love you!

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**I don't**

"Are you ready?" Edward asked his mother as he entered her bedchamber.

Elizabeth was sitting on the edge of her bed, wearing a beautiful, green dress. Her hair was made up in dozens of braids, auburn tendrils framing her face, and her skin had a pink tinge to it. Edward had been careful to hide every bottle of alcohol in the house, and although his mother didn't appreciate the gesture, he felt happy to see her sober.

"Mother?"

Elizabeth dropped the brush she was holding on the bed and stood up. "I changed my mind. I am not going."

Edward tried not to let the disappointment he was feeling show on his face. "I want you to be there. It's my wedding day, and I want you by my side."

She avoided his gaze, pretending to look out the window. "I don't see how my presence there will make a difference."

"It will make a difference to me." Edward walked toward her and put his hand on her shoulder, hoping she would not flinch away from him. He could see that she was trying to be indifferent, but her eyes were telling another story. She seemed conflicted, vulnerable. "I know you haven't gone out in public in years, and you are afraid, but you don't have to. You have to show everyone that –"

She shook his hand off. "I am not afraid of anyone. I simply don't understand why I have to be there. You can marry that girl without my assistance."

Edward let his hand fall to his side. When his mother told him that she was going to attend the wedding, he had been so relieved and pleased. He had been starting to hope that their relationship would improve, and they would grow closer. Obviously, he should have known that was not going to happen.

"This is the first thing I have asked of you in years. Why is it so hard for you to do one thing for me?" He saw her shoulders stiffen, and her lips thinned. Taking a deep breath, he turned his back on her and started toward the door. "I need to be at the church in ten minutes."

Bella also had to be at the church in ten minutes, but she could barely leave her own room. Her white dress was suffocating her, and her legs were trembling. Just the thought of walking down the aisle made her feel lightheaded. She had barely slept last night, and the dark circles beneath her eyes were proof of that.

Knowing that both her father and Rosalie were waiting for her downstairs, she tried to take a deep breath. Unfortunately, that wasn't possible because of the corset. Balling her hands into fists, she smoothed her hair and opened the door. She could hear murmurs downstairs. They must be growing impatient with her.

As soon as she reached the bottom of the stairs, Charlie turned around and saw her for the first time in her white dress. "Bella, you look so beautiful."

"Thank you," she whispered, a little uncomfortable.

"You really do," Rosalie added sheepishly, and Bella gave her a small smile. Rosalie smiled back.

"You will receive more compliments from me once we get in the carriage. We should have left five minutes ago. We are going to be late," Charlie said, gently grabbing Bella's elbow and leading her out of the house. Bella used her father's hand like a clutch, leaning into him.

"I don't mind," Bella murmured, but Charlie only squeezed her arm, helping her and Rosalie into the carriage. Bella sat opposite from her sister and next to her father.

"I know you are worried, but do not forget that I am going to be there and support you," Charlie encouraged her, grabbing her cold hand. "You didn't have enough time to prepare for this wedding, but I know Edward is a gentleman, and he will be patient and gentle with you." He paused. "You just have to … trust him."

Bella narrowed her eyes at her father. His face was red, and he seemed uncomfortable. "What exactly are we talking about right now?"

He chuckled awkwardly. "Nothing, dear. Do not fret. Everything will be fine."

"I think you just made me more nervous."

The carriage stopped in front of the church. Bella looked at her sister and swallowed hard. Rosalie gave her an encouraging smile that did nothing to soothe her fears. Bella grabbed Charlie's hand as he helped her out of the carriage. Before she looked up, she already knew from the sudden silence around them that the entire town was there. Everyone was staring at her, some of them smiling, the others not even trying to hide their curiosity. These were the people who hadn't been invited to the wedding, but had decided to come anyway.

Holding onto Charlie's arm, she walked toward the front doors of the church. Two men opened the doors, and then, everyone turned in their seats to look at her. She stopped breathing, suddenly petrified.

"Smile, Bella. You look like you are going to faint," Charlie whispered to her.

"I feel like I am going to," she whispered back, pasting a smile on her face.

"Wait until you get married," he jested, hoping to see a genuine smile on her lips. She chuckled weakly and took a step forward.

As she walked down the aisle, she couldn't help looking around. She saw Alice and Jasper smiling encouragingly at her. Alice waved at her, silently telling her that she adored the dress. Little Sophia was sitting next to Alice, and she squealed when she saw Bella.

She finally looked at her fiancée. Edward was standing at the altar, staring at her. She met his intense gaze, and her pulse quickened. In less than an hour, they were going to be husband and wife, and she knew nothing about the man.

After what seemed like an eternity, they arrived at the altar. Charlie placed Bella's hand into Edward's and whispered, "Take care of her."

Edward nodded, and then turned his attention to Bella. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you," she murmured, turning toward the priest.

Although his expression didn't betray his thoughts, she realized he was as nervous as she was. His hand was clammy and a little cold, and he was slowly tapping his foot against the floor. That made her feel a little better, knowing that she was not the only one anxious about this wedding.

After the ceremony, they were all supposed to go to Edward's house for the ball thrown in their honor. _She _was supposed to live with Edward. The thought sent shivers down her spine. Her clothes had already been packed and delivered to his house. It had felt so strange to see her wardrobe empty and her room stripped of all her belongings, knowing that from now on, she would spend her nights with her husband. She didn't even know what that really meant, but everyone blushed whenever she asked them. Was she going to find out tonight? Did she really want to find out?

"Isabella?"

She snapped out of her thoughts and realized that everyone was looking at her.

Blushing furiously, she asked, "Excuse me?"

The man sighed. "I will ask again. Do you, Isabella Marie Swan, take this man who now holds your hand, to be your true and wedded husband; and do you solemnly promise before God and these witnesses to love, cherish, honor and protect him, to forsake all others for his sake; to cleave unto him and him only, and him forever until death shall part you?"

Isabella unconsciously squeezed Edward's hand, but he didn't say anything if it hurt. He simply looked down at her with an unreadable expression. She wet her lips and looked over her shoulder at Rosalie. Her sister seemed anxious about Bella's silence – like everyone else inside the church.

Even though she wanted to say _I don't_, she couldn't. The irony of the situation suddenly hit her, and she almost laughed. She had been dreaming about this moment – wishing that Edward would fall in love with her and marry her. Now, that is was finally happening, all she wanted to do was run and never look back.

Taking a deep breath, she whispered, "I do."

She thought she heard the entire crowd sigh with relief.

After the father gave his blessing, Edward and Bella turned around and faced the crowd as husband and wife. Everyone rushed forward to congratulate them. He held Bella's hand as he smiled and nodded at the others, accepting their good-wishes. Bella smiled at everyone, her voice soft as she talked to them.

Then, Rosalie appeared in front of them, and they both stopped talking. "I just wanted to congratulate you," she said, with a self-conscious smile. "It was such a beautiful wedding," she added a second later.

Edward cleared his throat. "Of course. Thank you."

"Congratulations," Emmett broke the tension, slapping his friend on the back and leaning down to kiss Bella's hand. Edward gave him a grateful look. "It was, indeed, such a beautiful wedding, but only because of Miss Isabella. You truly look stunning in this dress."

Bella realized what he was trying to do and chuckled. "Thank you so much, Lord McCarty."

"My pleasure." He turned to Rosalie, offering her his arm. "I was just leaving for the ball. Would you like to join me?" He gave her a pointed look, daring her to refuse.

Realizing that there were other people watching them, Rosalie said, "Of course."

Bella saw Rosalie's blank expression, but her sister didn't protest – not in front of the others. She gracefully accepted Emmett's arm, and they both walked outside.

Edward sighed, relieved. He was shaking Lord Jasper's hand when he saw a familiar face at the entrance of the church. The person turned around to look at him, before she quickly disappeared. He allowed a small smile to curve his lips. It seemed that his mother had decided to come to the wedding, after all.

xXx

The ball was a success. Everyone was laughing and dancing. The men were taking turns to dance with the bride. Halfway through the ball, Bella had lost count of the men she had danced with. But even if she had danced with every other man at the ball, she had yet to dance with her husband. Her husband… It felt so strange to refer to Edward Cullen as her husband. With a sigh, she leaned against the wall, looking for him.

"Bella."

It seemed that he found her.

"Oh," she gasped, startled by his sudden appearance. "I wasn't expecting to see you."

"Because you have been avoiding me the entire night," he said, leaning against the wall next to her.

"Have I?" She looked around, searching for someone to greet. He was standing so close to her, she could almost feel his body heat.

"And you are doing it right now. Looking around, pretending that I am not standing right next to you."

"I am talking to you now, so I am not technically avoiding you," she mumbled, biting the inside of her cheek.

He frowned. "I didn't come here to argue with you. I came here to ask you to dance with me." When he saw her reluctant expression, he continued, "Everyone is getting suspicious. You have danced with every other man here, besides the man you married. They are starting to think something is wrong."

She whispered, "And isn't there?"

"I know you don't like me, and with good reason." He pushed away from the wall and walked in front of her, titling her head up. "Bella, all I ask for is one dance, as husband and wife. I don't want to give them a reason to talk behind our backs."

Bella looked at him suspiciously. "Do you care more about your reputation or mine?"

"Do not be ridiculous. I never cared about mine." With a smile, he raised his eyebrows and offered his hand to her, hoping she would take it. She seemed hesitant. "Just one dance."

She slowly put her hand into his. "Alright, I will dance with you."

He squeezed her hand, and they both walked toward the middle of the ballroom. His arm slipped around her waist and brought her closer to him. Her breath hitched. She could see everyone staring at them. Edward had been right. They had been wondering why they hadn't danced together yet. She tried not to look as nervous as she felt.

"I need to tell you something," he whispered, a few seconds later.

Bella looked up at him. "About what?"

"I was supposed to take my mother back to Hampshire a week ago," he started, a little hesitantly.

She realized she hadn't seen his mother yet. "Yes, I know. Why are you telling me this now?"

He sighed, his warm breath fanning over her lips. "I have been trying to tell you the entire week, but you wouldn't let me. Her health is deteriorating. She doesn't want to stay in London, and I can't let her go to Hampshire alone."

Her brow furrowed. "When do you want to leave?"

"As soon as possible."

She looked over his shoulder, considering his words. He wanted to leave London as soon as possible, and she was to go with him. She didn't like London very much, but her family was here. She also couldn't blame him for taking care of his mother.

"We don't have to leave tomorrow," he continued. "I told you, because you are my wife, and you deserved to know."

Hearing him call her _his wife_ made her blush. It made this surreal situation seem more real. She met his gaze, before she let her eyes drop to the collar of his stark white shirt. "I will think about it."

"Mind if I steal the bride for a minute?" Charlie asked, grinning at the couple.

Rosalie was looking at her sister and father dancing together, when Lord McCarty appeared next to her. She quickly looked at him, before she looked back at her father. "Do you have something to tell me, or are you here to gloat?"

He pretended to be shocked. "To gloat? Gloat about what?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes, crossing her arms across her chest. "Back at the church, when you made me feel like a fool in front of my sister and her husband."

Emmett took a sip of his drink and looked at her over the rim of his glass. "I only did what I thought was right. You were making them feel uncomfortable. Everyone noticed that. I had to take you out of there."

She pursed her lips, pretending that what he said didn't hurt. It seemed that she wasn't convincing, because he said, "I didn't want to hurt your feelings, but you know it's true. Just give them some time."

Even though she didn't want to agree with him, she knew he was right. She had seen the discomfort on her sister's face. "I never wanted to hurt them," she confessed, her voice barely a whisper.

Emmett had turned around to leave, but he seemed to have heard her, because he looked back. "I know. It's human nature to make mistakes. You just have to fix them."

The ball continued for four more hours. Bella was starting to feel very tired and anxious. Every woman she had talked to in the last hour had seemed giddy with excitement about her wedding night, talking about how wonderful or nerve-wrecking theirs had been. She had tried to ask them what was supposed to happen tonight, but they had all been giggling and laughing, half intoxicated. Some of the women had been very intoxicated, and Bella had overhead them talking about her sudden marriage to Edward.

Now, the entire house was empty and silent. The guests had left half an hour ago. A servant had shown Bella her room, and now, she was waiting for Irina to help her with the dress. She looked at the connecting door that led to Edward's room. She didn't know if he was inside. The room seemed quiet.

The other door opened, and Irina walked inside. "Irina, I have been waiting for you."

"I am right here," the maid answered with a mischievous smile. She walked behind Bella and helped her with the buttons on her back. "This is the night. Are you nervous?"

"Can anyone tell me what is supposed to happen tonight?"

Irina seemed surprised that Bella didn't know. After she quickly opened the buttons of the dress, she walked around Bella and stopped in front of her. "You don't know." Bella shook her head in consternation. "Oh."

"You obviously do, so tell me. Everyone keeps talking about it, without actually telling me anything. It makes me very nervous. So, tell me."

Irina blushed, avoiding Bella's gaze. "Well, I don't know if it's my place to tell you. I suppose Lord Cullen will when –"

"Irina, please," Bella sighed.

"Alright." The maid took Bella's dress off as she talked. "On your wedding night, the husband and wife … sleep together."

"Sleep together, as in sleep next to each other?"

"No, as in sleep … _together,_" Irina countered, emphasizing the last word. Seeing Bella's confused expression, she grimaced. "Fine, I will be more blunt. You two will get naked and be intimate."

Bella's eyes widened. "Naked?" she squeaked, but Irina was still talking.

"It's not always pleasant the first time, but it gets better. You will like it." Irina winked at Bella.

"Wait a second. What do you mean we will be naked and intimate? What does intimate mean?"

"Seriously? Didn't your father talk to you about this?" Irina asked, starting to feel self-conscious.

Bella gave her a scathing look. "If he did, why would I ask you?"

Irina took the wedding dress and put the dress into the wardrobe. "Intimate means… He will make love to you. If he is a considerate and passionate lover – as I think he is – he will kiss you and hold you and arouse you, making the experience wonderful for you. You don't have to think about it; you just have to feel everything, and you will know what to do."

Bella still had so many questions, but there wasn't any more time. Edward knocked on the connecting door.

Blushing, she looked down at her scanty nightgown and asked, "Can I refuse if I don't want to be intimate with him?"

Irina seemed troubled. "I don't know. Ask him."

Edward opened the door. "I hope I don't interrupt anything." His gaze went to Bella and traveled down her body, before he looked at Irina.

"Not at all. I was just leaving." Irina nodded at Edward, smiled at Bella and walked out of the room.

Edward could tell she was nervous. Her head was bowed, and her cheeks were pink. He walked toward Bella and titled her head up. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, of course I am. Are you?" she stuttered.

He nodded, almost smiling at her. She was so different from her sister. Rosalie would have rolled her eyes at the awkwardness and thrown her arms around his neck. But Bella's innocence was refreshing. Did she know what was supposed to happen tonight?

"Are you going to undress me now or later?"

He almost chocked on his own saliva. "What?" She obviously knew _something._

"I mean, it's our wedding night," she quickly continued, her face becoming more red than pink. "I understood that we were both going to be naked, and you are still fully dressed. It will take some time to undress you. Oh, what am I saying? What I mean is that –"

He put a finger on her lips, silencing her. "Take a deep breath."

She took a deep breath, her lips tingling from his gentle touch. He moved his hand to her shoulder.

"I came to talk to you," he whispered.

"Again?"

He laughed this time. "Yes, again."

"What do you want to talk to me about?"

"I can see that you are not ready, and I will not force myself on you." She opened her mouth to speak, but he interrupted her. "Let me talk first. You are a beautiful woman, Bella, and I don't want you to think that I won't consummate this marriage tonight, because I don't find you attractive. I am not trying to find an excuse, and I want to have a real marriage with you. I just think we should wait a little."

Bella almost sighed with relief. Nonetheless, even though she was relieved, there was a very, very small part of her that was irritated with him. She ignored that irrational part of her and smiled gratefully at him.

"Thank you," she whispered. "I was thinking the same thing." Still, there was something nagging at her. "Do you want to wait because of Rosalie?"

"I want to wait because of you. Rosalie is not a part of this marriage, and she will never be."

With a short nod, she decided to believe him. Time would tell if he was honest or not.

He smiled and squeezed her shoulder. Taking her by surprise, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to her forehead. Her heart stuttered inside her chest.

"Goodnight, then," she said, her voice trembling a little.

But before he turned around, he cupped her face in his hands and kissed her. Her eyes widened again. His lips were warm and soft, and before she could react, he pulled away and whispered, "Goodnight."

He turned around and walked toward his room. Her hand itched to touch her lips.

As she watched him leave her bedchamber, she remembered what she had heard at the ball. Everyone was still curious about their wedding, their relationship. If they wanted to have a real marriage, or at least try to have one, they would have to leave London and its rumors.

"Edward?"

"Yes?" He turned to look at her.

"Can we leave tomorrow?"


End file.
